If there ever was a time to do nothing ...

A story in tonight's paper talks about how a two-story parking garage might be good for the west side of Monroe St. Proponents of this plan better watch what they wish for. Given the city's much ballyhooed financial crisis, chances are some merchants might end up paying for a good chunk of this, directly or indirectly. Hopefully, some saner heads might prevail. What's funny about this is both Beneteau and Compora, who don't always see eye to eye, seem to be on the same side of this issue. They think more signs pointing to existing lots might be the answer, especially because the county and city are considering a big structure near the government buildings. In this case, delay might be the right move.

Not that it matters, but ...

I saw that debate at the community college with the local candidates. At one point, John Manor said he decided to run for office because he covered politics as a reporter for a major metropolitan newspaper and was pained by what he saw. So he decided to run. I checked his Web site to find out what major newspaper he worked for. It says he's worked for 13 years as marketing manager for the Michigan Chronicle ... covering politics. Now wait a minute. What would a marketing manager be doing covering politics?
So I went to the Michigan Chronicle Web site. I searched the site for John Manor. Do you know how many articles about politics came up? None. Do you know how many articles about anything came up? None.
So I figured the Chronicle's search system is screwed up. So I searched the Internet for articles about politics written by John Manor. You guessed it: Nada.
Now it doesn't really matter if he was or wasn't covering politics. That certainly wouldn't necessarily qualify anyone to hold office, anyway. But it might be worth someone looking into, if only because a candidate really shouldn't lie about his background.
Ebli campaign -- are you listening?

How about those paid professionals?

Now that the Tigers afterglow is over, I got to thinking about professional sports as an occupation. Comparatively speaking, considering all the hype, being a paid professional athlete seems far more important than working in a factory or office. Now suppose you work in a factory and every so often, you make a mistake in your job. What would normally happen. Suppose you work in an office and every so often you make a mistake or you're late for work. I've actually seen people who have been late for work had their pay docked. Yet, if you're a professional athlete, like a ballplayer, and are paid millions to catch a ball, what happens if you miss it? What happens if you make an error?
Nothing.
Shouldn't they dock the pay of professional athletes based on how many stupid errors they make. You know, like if a fly ball hits you in the chest, shouldn't your pay be reduced by $200,000?
I think so.

Dead-eye misses the mark

I see the Monroe Snooze came out with its endorsement in the Oley-Osment race for county commissioner today. Surprise, the paper went with Osment, not Oley the incumbent and chairman of the county board of commissioners. In every other race, they've endorsed the current officeholders, no matter how bad they might be. Theres a few lame reasons for endorsing Osment given, but the best reason seems to be that he collects bad debts for the newspaper. I wonder what the real story is here. Maybe it's that Oley's photo on billboards and campaign literature shows him with those scary dead-like eyes. SOMEBODY PLEASE TELL HIM!

Parking problems or money problems?

Everyone's been told the city has serious money problems and, frankly, there never is enough money to appropriately fund government, is there? There's a lot of debate about whether the downtown has a parking problem. There seems to be a serious one right around the courthouse and city hall, mainly because few people want to walk a couple blocks from municipal lots. But some say there really isn't a parking problem. Like when's the last time you couldn't find a spot within a half block of a downtown business? That must be the reason the Knights of Columbus apparently decided to declare their parking lot off limits. There are too many other spots available downtown. But the move seems to have a few postal workers are on the verge of going postal over this little alteration, which has pushed about 50 cars elsewhere. This raises some suspicions. No one uses the KofC lot during the daytime. Why would this charitable, religious-based organization want to ban any use of this lot when it's not being used for KofC functions. Anyone care to guess?

DeVos breaks law in Monroe County

You probably won't hear about this one anywhere else, but it looks like would-be governor Dick DeVos is violating state law in Monroe County. Or maybe someone acting on his behalf is violating the law. Just about across from the Toyota dealership on S. Dixie is a big almost billboard size campaign size right near the curb. It certainly grabs the attention. Hope it doesn't grab the attention of the road commission. The sign is in the road right of way which means the cops or road commission can remove it and destroy it. They should since it can obstruct part of the vision for drivers who might enter S. Dixie from the east. Maybe someone will complain about it. All campaign signs are supposed to be beyond a road right of way which is like 30 feet from the curb. There are a lot of violators around but this DeVos sign appears to be the largest and most blatant.

Garbled sound again

Ah hah!
I guess I'm not THAT crazy afterall.
There's a thing in the Monroe Snooze tonight about how the city is trying to figure out how to improve the sound on the cable TV broadcasts of council meetings. The fun-loving group has been taking its show on the road (cripes, is the city really that big?) and some of the acoustics aren't exactly friendly to the ears. Someone in the city said the sound in "unintelligible."
I've been complaining about that sound when they broadcast from council chambers. I get mostly distorted garbage unless the person speaking is speaking softly or a distance from the mic.
The problem will arise if they fix the sound and everyone still finds what's coming from the mouths of council as unintelligible. And I can tell you that's a real possibility because I've been to a city council meeting before.

The old Custer joke comes alive

Anyone who's been around here for a while knows the old story. When Custer left town, he supposedly told everyone in Monroe "Don't do anything until I come back!"
That's a put down of people who prefer the status quo.
Others have said the city limit sign should say: "Welcome to Monroe. We like it here. And we're not going to change a damn thing!"
Well, we do like it here. But the city council's recent action on the plan to re-align the Front and Third St. intersection is almost too easy to parody.
Of the three possible options for reworking the roads, the council majority chose something called "the do-nothing option."
That's hilarious.
They have to realize their detractors are going to start calling them the do-nothing council. But maybe that's the idea -- they just want to send a message to all the townies that they plan to do nothing. A lot of townies would be fine with that too.
Custer certainly would be pleased -- until he saw that big new bank building and that pavilion at Loranger Square and some of the new stores and restaurants that have popped up recently downtown.
Oh wait! He couldn't blame council for ANY of that!

Early projection

All right, the polls haven't closed yet, but I'm calling the race for Governor: It's GRANHOLM by a narrow margin.
The last televised debate was last night and DeVos just dug himself a bigger hole. I really liked his strange answer on the question of whether unions were at the heart of Michigan's problems. Kinda wishy-washy. Sorry Dick, no guts, no glory.
Granholm had a nifty retort, citing that GEMA in Dundee is unionized and is a joint effort of three foreign automakers.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not entralled with Granholm. I'm just calling it as I see it. DeVos basically ran because he had the money and nobody was going to stop him anyway. He's just the wrong candidate, even though the Republicans would have had a good shot at the job this year if they had fielded someone else.
I actually know some Republicans who have papered over their DeVos bumper stickers with Granholm ones.
He shouldn't be totaled disappointed. He could be elected some day -- if there ever is an elective office called Grand Squirrely Jerk.
While I'm at it, I might as well call the 17th Senate race. It's RICHARDVILLE, though it might be closer than most people think.
While I'm at it, we'll give ANGERER the nod for re-election and an extra tip of the hat for not even mentioning her opponent's drunk driving arrest.
We're still watching the Manor-Ebli race and it's fascinating to see how their campaign strategies seem to differ. I really wonder who decides the approach.

We'll withhold comment on other local races at this time.

Please, no more garbage!

Boy, now I know how loyal readers of this blog sometimes feel. Too much garbage can make you ill.
That's why I'm kind of ill with John Manor's effort to capitalize on the success the Democrats have had in making garbage disposal in Michigan a political issue.
You might remember I recalled hearing a radio ad in which Manor says he and his wife were hoping to start a family near Carleton, then realized they couldn't stay there because there was a big landfill nearby. Now he's got an ad running on cable TV that says his parents couldn't look forward to retiring in their home because it was near a landfill. I guess the truth is he was living with his parents as a newlywed and they wanted to move out. And I guess now he can use their house in a campaign ad because it was across from the Carleton Farms landfill.
These ads are real tear-jerkers -- except Manor or his handlers must be forgetting that his own party -- the Republicans -- were the ones that let the state moratorium on landfill expansions expire.
So he really needs to distant himself from that party if he doesn't want people to perceive his campaign ads as garbage.

Holy moley Oley!

It seems like overnight a billion Jerry Oley for county commissioner campaign signs went up, including a billboard or two.
On the billboard, Jerry is violating one of the first lessons of advertising -- don't use unflattering pictures of yourself with your ad. It's not that Jerry is ugly. It's just that he looks a little like a mafia hitman on the billboard. His eyes, particularly, are downright spooky. Someone should be a pal and tell him that.
With all the signs, it makes you wonder how much money he's blowing on trying to get elected to the county board -- and what future political aspirations he might have. It almost looks like he's spending more money than he'll get back in salary. But I forgot, politicians aren't in it for the salary or the benefits or the retirement. They just want to serve the public.
Speaking of serving the public, is it too early to guess who's going to run for Monroe mayor?
So what. Let's guess anyway.
I say Al Cappuccilli will go for it again.
It almost looks like Mark Worrell is angling for it.
There's probably a good chance John Iacoangeli will make a bid.
Dark horses: John Martin, Andrew Smith, Brian Beneteau.
Anyone else care to throw some names/rumors in the mix?
And one last political note: Did anyone see the second debate for governor? If this keeps up, DeVos might win with the sympathy vote. He should just cancel the third debate, stay off of the TV and not open his mouth. He should fire whoever put him up to this in the first place. Seriously, at this point, his stands really don't matter anymore. He just needs to stay away from debates. This time if the polls don't show an uptick for Granholm the polling system has got to be flawed.

Speaking of nuts...

One of the faithful readers of this blog -- I'll call him Mr. Anonymous -- left a comment on the post below about the "nuts" who might be attracted to a county board meeting like the ones who attend city council meetings, just to see themselves on TV.
This is a very good point. The problem with some of the people who speak before city council is they like to hear the sound of their own voice too much. I won't mention any specific names, like David Smith, but they mustn't understand that if they would just make their points concisely and sit down, they'd come across as more knowledgeable and less as blowhards. Watching the city meetings is entertaining whenever I can make out the garbled, distorted audio. It's funny how none of the other public access programs seem to suffer from this same problem.
Speaking of other programs, I think the quality of some of them is getting better. I like the food show, lotus ghingko and the John Patterson show. They are all pretty well done. Even Dr. Ghai's heart show is interesting, but it could be done on radio and be just as interesting.
Shows that should be ditched include Monroe Alive -- I mean I know Mrs. Lavoy is well-intentioned but she comes across as someone with dementia -- and the Dr. Scott Hughes show -- talk about putting your foot in your mouth! Compared to these two, the long-winded nuts who come to city council are a breath of fresh air.

Not ready for prime time?

While channel-surfing the other night I ran across one of those ad nauseum rebroadcasts of a Monroe City Council meeting. Like, one or two or those are enough but, man, it seems they're on all the time. If you're really hooked on city council (or just on it), it could be entertaining. But they should do something to jazz it up. Maybe have themed clothing night -- every member of council has to wear a funny hat, or flannel pajamas (with feet in them) or see how many motions they can sponsor (the winners gets a cash award for his or her favorite charity). It will increase viewership, I'm sure, and will take away from the frustrating, garbled sound that is supposed to be the audio. I gotta hand it to the city though -- at least they're televising this stuff to try to give constituents the unvarnished truth (or what passes for unvarnished truth). Maybe the county board should start televising their meetings.
On second thought, they probably figure the broadcast couldn't compete with that other show that's been fairly popular: JACKASS.

Still more junk mail

The latest batch of junk political mail is almost comical. I can only envision some boilerroom in Lansing where the brainiacs from both parties put this stuff together thinking they're being clever and winning votes when they're alienating voters.
One piece that arrived at my house said "WARNING -- when Michigan Republicans don't vote ... Bad things happen." It continues to say "Don't let the liberals win. One picture is of Middle East terrorists and notes that "Democrats will cut and run on the War on Terror." One picture is a montage of Hilary Clinton, Ted Kennedy, John Kerry and Michael Moore. It says "The radical left and the liberal media will continue to demand massive tax increases, a flood of new regulations and an assault on our values."
Now wait a minute. If the Dems are going to assault Rep. Foley's values, I'm all for them.
Another flier from Kate Ebli says she believes our education dollars should be spent directly in the classroom -- not on wasteful bureaucracy. It says every dollar spent here is an investment in our future. I'm not quite sure what the message is meant to be. I think it's trying to say every dollar spent in the classroom is an investment in our future. I think the dollars spent on the flier are kind of wasted, since the message is so fuzzy. But at least it's not offensive.
Then a real funny flier comes from the Michigan Republicans on behalf of John Manor. It says Manor is lifetime member of the NRA and a staunch defender of the 2nd amendment attacks from liberal extremists. It has a photo of Manor in hunting gear (he doesn't appear to be carrying a gun) and he's standing next to a shotgun-toting DICK CHENEY LOOK-ALIKE. How bizarre.
Even more bizarre is the flip side of the flier that has a real scary looking ski-masked guy toting a gun. It says "if the liberal anti-gun extremists backing Kate Ebli get their way, it will be easier for this guy to own a gun than it will be for you."
NEWS FLASH -- It already is because criminals don't follow gun registration laws.
BTW, the scary-looking crook with the ski-mask -- if you look close you can tell it's actually RANDY RICHARDVILLE growling behind the mask!
Actually, he can be forgiven. Richardville's junk mail has been very tasteful and far more effective than that of his opponent, Bob Schockman, who hasn't sent anything to my place --yet.
While the political parties continue to crank out this garbage, I have a couple of suggestions for the Ebli and Manor camps.
How about this: When Ebli's name is rearranged, it's just one letter short of being EVIL.
And when Manor's name is rearranged, it's just one letter shy of being NORMAL.
They can use that stuff and I won't even charge them.

Seriously, I started to panic a little

Actually, this is more funny than anything else, and I really do appreciate the efforts the Downtown Development Authority-Main Street-Good Guys-Booster Group-City-subsidized whatever-it's-called committee is doing.
They do have a little bit of a fixation on lightposts downtown, but other than that, the place looks a lot more like somebody cares about it than it once did.
But the other night I was leaving a downtown establishment (no it wasn't a bar and I wasn't drunk) and I about soiled my pants.
It looked as if every transient person, drunk and vagrant who frequents downtown was leaning up against a lightpost just waiting to panhandle or mug me.
Then I realized what I was seeing in the dim light were the festive scarecrows that the downtown group had posted at every lightpost to give the downtown that seasonal autumn ambience.
What made it even scarier was that one of the lightposts had two scarecrows leaning up against it -- and one of them was REAL! It was some woman clutching a purse and taking long drags on a cigarette.
It's funny how things appear so different in a different light when there's hardly anyone on the street. It was almost surreal. The full moon didn't help either.
What might be even scarier is to find out how much money the city spent watering the potted plants that the DDA hung on the lightposts this summer. If you watched the thorough jobs city crews did in watering them (even in the rain) you'd start thinking that it might be cheaper to go with artificial plants next season. Tackier, sure, but cheaper.

A tight race

Okay, I was a bit off.
The governor's race appeared little changed by the results of the first debate between Granholm and DeVos. The latest poll puts Granholm ahead by 6 points with a 4 point margin or error. Meanwhile, her approval ratings are still on the negative side.
So maybe the debates aren't that much of a factor in this race.
What might be a factor is the odd revelations involving U.S. Rep. Mark Foley, the Florida Republican who sent some pretty rough e-mails to 16-year-old pages, then blamed it on the fact that he's an alcoholic homosexual who was molested by a priest, raised by wolves and is in fact a card-carrying member of the Communist Party with a bad case of herpes.
Let's see, did I leave out any other excuses?
Watch though, he'll probably be elected a senator before it's all over. But the scandal is causes all sorts of fits in the GOP. Republicans are finding that the only thing on the minds of their constituents back home are questions about Foley and some believe the scandal actually will affect Republican contests across the nation. I doubt if it will have any impact on the Governor's race in Michigan since Granholm already accused DeVos of molesting seniors with Alzheimer's.
By the way, wasn't it cool how Fox News ran a story on Foley and all the while the graphics identified him as a Florida DEMOCRAT.
You watch. This kind of stuff is going to cause a backlash that will have most Americans holding the rest of the media in unwarranted higher esteem compared to Fox's version of "fair and balanced."

More junk mail

Gotta 'nother batch of junk mail and it's just as slimy as the first -- except for one piece, which I'll get to later.
One comes and says that John Manor's cronies in Lansing are out to keep exporting Michigan's jobs.
That's patently unfair. John doesn't have cronies in Lansing -- yet.
Another piece attacks Kate Ebli because while she was a cable company executive, cable rates and complaints went up and we don't need leadership like that in Lansing.
That's quite a stretch but it's sort of clever -- linking Ebli to the universal evil that are cable companies.
Another piece from John Manor says he's fighting to turn Michigan around. This one was very slick, very tasteful, has a picture of him and his baby, I think, and talks about staying away from the political bickering. I almost went out and volunteered for his campaign after reading this one. Then I remembered he doesn't need the help because he's got cronies in Lansing.
Speaking of those cronies, there's another Manor radio ad I heard in which he talks about having to move in his earlier years because the stench from a nearby landfill drove him and his wife away.
Surely he knows that his "cronies" in Lansing -- Republicans all -- were the ones that allowed the state's moratorium on landfill expansions to expire so every dump around could file a request to enlarge their place. If I were him, I'd dump that ad quickly.

Round One: Granholm

Watched the DeVos-Granholm debate on the tube last night and was thoroughly entertained (yeah, that's right, if I had a life I wouldn't be doing this blog either). When the hour came to a close, the judges (me, myself & I) declared Granholm the winner.
She has a clear advantage because she's comfortable in a political setting, has been asked awkward questions before by others, and she has mastered the fine art of turning a question into a commercial for herself.
Question: "Gov. Granholm, how do you account for the fact that Michigan's economy is in the toilet and there's nothing but despair on the horizon?"
Answer: "I'm glad you mentioned the horizon because I challenge anyone to argue that Michigan, the Great Lakes State, doesn't have some of the most wonderful horizons in the United States. Those are horizons that draw tourists and, as you know, tourism is one of the pillars of our state's economy. And whenever you see a horizon, you know the sun's going to come up tomorrow."
DeVos, on the other hand, always seemed as if someone was accusing him of something dastardly. Well, Granholm did accuse him of molesting seniors with Alzheimer's, but everything else was pretty softball.
Nonetheless, he stood there with a fake half-smile repeatedly saying how much he was disappointed with the Governor's leadership.
Well, she was leading in the polls by 9 points before the debate. I bet the first poll after the debate shows she's increased her lead.
But don't count out DeVos. He didn't do horribly for a first debate. I'm sure he'll be better prepared for the second one.
Who knows, but the third, they might be choking each other. That would be too cool!

Who's to blame?

That's what a lot of people are probably asking themselves after today's events in which little Amish girls are killed execution-style in an one-room school in Lancaster, Pa.
That's probably what they're wondering after Rep. Foley is outed for sending horrible instant messages to young Congressional pages.
This is the kind of stuff that causes introspection on the part of some people and makes them question about how society has failed.
Society hasn't failed anyone.
The Amish kid killer and Foley are a couple on one-act nutcases that have no one to blame but their own weird tortured minds, though Foley is trying to blame alcohol for his problems.
Yeah, when I get drunk I send disgusting instant messages to young boys, too.
Too bad the kid-killer just didn't blow himself away instead of deciding to take a bunch of innocent Amish kids with him.
Foley probably should do the honorable thing now and blow himself away instead of hanging around and taking down half the Republican Party with him.

Rumblings

This is a long shot, but I'll go out on the limb.
Sometime next year, Monroe County will have a new county executive.
That means if your a stock speculator, Londo is a sell recommendation.
Charles Londo is the county's appointed administrator. Since being fired a few years ago and then reinstated, he has continued to build a political power base. All reports are that he's a nice enough guy but his inconsistency in opening and closing the county's pursestrings seem to be getting a lot of people upset. That includes many in the county's law enforcement community, including some who are elected, i.e. the sheriff. Londo is elected by no one but really has a lot to say about the county's direction and its priorities.
Londo has held his job because he has his political ducks lined up and there are more followers than leaders on the county board.
But the rumblings are increasing. History has shown that public safety is a hot-button issue with citizens and commissioners alike, so if you're going to duel at high noon with the sheriff, you're going to lose -- especially if he has his partners on the rooftops ready to snipe you before you even get a chance to draw.
Look for Londo's body laying in the dusty street of Monroe County politics sometime in 2007 -- unless he mounts up and leaves town before the posse takes him down.
But what do I know?